Blog Slacker

I had the time to write a great blog or take a nap-- I chose the nap. When I was considering whether or not to start a blog, and friends encouraged me to do so, I had two fears. The first was that I would get so sucked up and drawn into blog world that nothing else would get done unless it was directly screaming at me. The second fear was that I would start it and then slowly drift away and have this nagging relic of a thing I left dangling.
I do that sometimes, I get enthused about a new project and then it becomes part of the ordinary and everyday world. And I’m only so-so on the everyday part of life. I like a good meal and kid hugs, but I generally like fantasy and science-fiction and the NOT ordinary. I lose track of what the point is in the everyday and mundane (kid hugs are always important and the food, well, I just like food).
I’m half listening to a couple at church sharing a testimony about how God brought them through her battle with cancer (yes, I’m in church, not really giving it my full attention--sorry). They were asked if they would undo the cancer, change that part of history if they were given the option (which is one of those questions I hate). And their answer is about how suffering produces growth and change and such and I will assume that I missed the best part of that answer/response because I was thinking about how much I struggle with things that seem pointless and repetitive. (Rote learning was never my strong suit. Talk about ways to bring out my oppositional streak.) The more ordinary something becomes, the more repetitive, the more it seems to provide no benefit, the more it annoys me. Of course, I only make the bed when I’m changing the sheets, because all I’m going to do is sleep in it. (If my room were also a study or some other living space, I might feel differently, but...)
Unfortunately, I have rambled to say that I’ve become a blog slacker. Now, in my regular life, things are acceptably clean and bills get paid on time and my child gets fed regularly, so I can get things done. But I have to move past the the first failing (becoming absorbed) and the second failing (neglecting it completely) and into the place where I know why it matters and how far to let it affect me. (Because perfectionism is waiting it’s turn. No, correct that, it is screaming at me now about how I sound like a jerk and there is no way I could possibly post this.)
The thing about blogging is, I enjoy reading everyone else’s posts. Then I see my listing on the blogs of people I care about... Three weeks ago... a month ago... and I realize that I’m not playing along. So, while I keep hoping to share what is important or deep or spiritual, I’ll try to at least share something. Because what I care about is the sense that I have connected with the friends I know, and maybe one or two I have the opportunity to know yet.